We have a choice, everyday, multiple times a day of our minds focus… Are you in the negative or positive? Read on our second positivity training!
We have so many thoughts and feelings that parade in our heads. We can have up to 60,000 thoughts a day! Studies show that 95% of those thoughts are repetitive and a whopping 80% are negative. These thoughts are random and transient. They are perceptions, projections, worries and fears. It is important to note that they are not fact or the truth; they are your brains best guess at fact and truth. This is overwhelming, I know.
So what to do? We can change!
The good news is that you are in control. While the above stated information is our reality, we don’t have to be blown around by the winds of redundancy and negativity. WE ARE CAPABLE OF SELF COMMAND and CHANGE! And guess what? You already have a week of gratitude journaling under you belt to push you toward that positive change and focus! Phew! And to add to this practice, I have another positivity focus tool.
According to John Gottman’s research (look him up, it’s worth it), in order to save us from our hard wired negative bias we need to out weigh the negativity with positivity. If you have a negative interaction with someone in your life, you get to counteract that interaction with three positives. Our brains require 3 positive interactions to every negative. If someone is negative to you or your self talk gets negative toward yourself, someone else or your situation… you get to say three gratitudes or three positive self-love statements. It is incredible how this works. You will slowly find yourself inadvertently letting go of the bad and bringing in the good! *Do remember that depending on where you are with your mental health, this can take time.
So there you have it. 3:1 – Positive:Negative interactions!
Two steps for shifting your focus to the positive.
Again, remember that our brains are muscles and we have strong negative neural pathways designed over the eons to keep us safe from lions, dangerous weather and invaders. We have to work hard to train our brains for today’s world and today’s safety needs. I find it helps to think about these challenges as a mental fitness workout to go along with my physical fitness workout! Both are hard to make time for and to do, but it is our choice to make time so that we can feel good, positive and fit!
May you not just experience positivity today, but be the agent of positivity.